All About Preparing For Custody Mediation

How do I prepare for custody mediation? What should I say and what really takes place? These are amongst those essential questions that every parent will ask an experienced San Bernardino family law attorney prior to they walk into a custody mediation.

The child custody mediation to which we refer is the mandatory mediation at court. The court sets this mediation date when a parent files a request for child custody order. This is not a private mediation with a privately paid mediator, where the parents get to choose a retired judge or lawyer to be the mediator.

How do I prepare for custody mediation when the other parent is so unreasonable?

This is probably the most common question asked to a professional Orange County divorce mediator. We hear the following:

  1. The other parent is a nightmare to deal with
  2. I just can’t imagine being able to come to an agreement with someone like that
  3. How can I possibly prepare for custody mediation with a parent like that?

Be reasonable and do not pressure yourself to agree

Your obligation is to engage in good faith negotiations and to actively take part in the mediation. That means you:

  1. Walk in with an open mind
  2. Remain willing to listen
  3. You will be reasonable throughout the entire mediation process

But being reasonable does not mean you have to agree to something you do not want for the children.

Focus on what you believe is in the best interest of the children

Let us now answer the core question.

The other parent is unreasonable. He or she is difficult, extremely stubborn and narcissistic. Possibly the other parent simply would like to user the children as leverage and really does not care regarding parenting time. Maybe the other parent simply cares more about child support. Or the other parent simply would like to make this as difficult as possible on you.

No matter what reason, a practiced domestic violence lawyer in Orange County suggests that the most promising approach to prepare for a custody mediation when you have a parent like that is to make the other parent irrelevant in the process of making your decision. What do we mean by that?

Have you ever seen and heard a barking dog that barks for no reason? What do you do? Go up to the dog and try to negotiate with it? No, you leave it alone. Do not let the other parent’s barking, attempts at intimidation or other tactics stress you out. Do not let emotions make your decisions for you.

You do not have to worry about what the other parent thinks or feels to prepare for custody mediation. You simply have to be clear regarding what you believe to be in the best interest of the children and why. The “why” part is essential for the reason that you also do not want to be unreasonable. according to an experienced family law attorney in Riverside, it is not enough to say, “I want this custody plan because I want it,” without being able to articulate a logical, child-centered reason for it.

How do I prepare for custody mediation when I do not know what parenting plan makes sense for the children?

You would like to prepare for custody mediation but you feel overwhelmed. You do not know what parenting plan schedule actually makes sense for the kids. What do you do? Do not worry.

What documents should you read to prepare for custody mediation?

Possibilities are pretty good that you or the other parent field a request for order and that set the mediation. Hopefully, if the other parent field the request for order, you timely field and served your responsive declaration to the request for order.

These two sets of documents are the starting point to prepare for a custody mediation. The request for order that initiated the process and the responsive declaration should tell the factual story of what the moving and opposing parties would like. But it is not an ending point.

If you are also in search of a specialist family law attorney in Orange County to help you prepare for child custody mediation process, feel free to get in touch with Sunita Sood at The Law Offices of Sood and Sood!